Heart Like Mine
by Caramelapple27
Summary: This is a song fiction describing Patrick Jane his thoughts in the season 6 finale. The song is Heart Like Mine by Keith Urban.


Heart Like Mine

**I heard this song and thought that it instantly screamed season 6 finale and had to write something. This is from Jane's point of view. The first half of the song is him sitting in his hotel room after Lisbon leaves for the airport. I assume he would have done some thinking during that second half is Jane leaving for the airport and on the plane as well as the TSA cell. **

**The song is called Heart Like Mine by Keith Urban.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own anything other than the Mentalist DVD's and Keith Urban's album Fuse**

_I watched out the window _

_As you drove away_

His plan to keep Teresa Lisbon in Austin failed. He now knew it was a mistake to use one of his tricks and digging out a cold case. He still wanted to solve the murder. He deserved that glass of water thrown in his face. After she stormed up the stairs, he knew instantly he needed to at least talk to her and apologize. She was too angry though and would not hear him. _"You don't give a damn about what I want or need. I am just a convenience for you. You use me. It's all about you."_ The words did ring true at some point during his mission to hunt Red John. Now all he could think of was her happiness, however he wanted to let her know how much she meant to him. He needed the time to do so with this case. He only did what he knew how. Tricks and games. Now she was leaving for the airport he knew in a cab to go to Marcus Pike to Washington D.C. And now he was just wallowing in his own grief of not saying anything sooner.

_But we got so much history baby_

_Too much good love to throw away_

His history with Teresa had been a long one. Twelve years to be exact. When he entered the CBI on that fateful day, he was messed up. The day he was introduced to her, he emerged from a horrible place. His family ripped from him by Red John by a mistake he should not have done.

When he started working with Teresa it was true that she was a means to an end and she was the key to helping him get his revenge, however as the he spent more time with her he really started to enjoy her company as the years went on. She became his best friend. He knew she had a tragic past as well with the deaths of her parents and having to raise three younger brothers on her own. He admired her persistence and courage as well as her support to him no matter how much grief he caused her along the way. She was the light in his dark world of revenge. She kept him grounded. She made him smile. He always looked forward to seeing her everyday. He never expected from their good friendship that during the time he would fall in love with her.

_I know I can be a headstrong man_

At times during his crusade for revenge he would get too serious. When Teresa would offer him help he would refuse it. He wanted his revenge on his own completely. He was adamant about killing Red John his way, while Teresa wanted to go by the rules of putting him on trial. He knew he never told her the whole truth and not allow her to let her in on his plan. After a while he needed her to confide in including revealing the seven suspect list. He knew she had cared for him and worried. When he found out she had told Grace to put bugs on the suspects he was angry. He should have realized she would let the team know so they could help as well. He never should have yelled then he knew later but then when Red John answered Teresa's phone a chill came over him. He instantly was afraid when he came to the scene, that a bloody smile would be over her body. The past would come to haunt him once again. He was relieved when Red John left her alive, however he had painted the smile on her face with Partridge's blood.

_Got a jealous streak a counry mile wide_

When Teresa was dating Pike he had wanted to be happy for her. He knew he should be since she had told him on the plane to let her live her own life and not control it. So he did just that. He stood out of her way. He knew she would be better off with a pure man, a less tainted man. A stable man. A man exactly like Marcus Pike. It was when she revealed that Pike had asked her to go to D.C. with him he instantly felt the pain that he would be losing her. He then started to really feel the pain and the jealousy.

_It's just that I'm so damn scared of losing you_

_As you're fading out of sight_

Now here he was drinking away his pain. She was probably now at the airport. He realized during his two years in South America he really missed Teresa. She was all he could think about so he started writing letters to her. He had wanted to let her know he was fine. Now he would lose her and he felt an empty space in his heart. He was in love with her for sure then. He knew by now she was probably at the airport calling Pike telling him she was coming.

_Ooh, ooh I don't know why I do this everytime_

_Ooh, ooh run the other way from a heart like mine_

He did not understand why he could not face his feelings he had for a long time for Teresa. The problem was he hid them. During his time hunting for Red John he knew he could not. Now he really did not understand. He was free to do so now. It was a fact that he ran from them. He remembered when he told her 'love you' when he "shot" her during his plan to catch Red John. When confronted by her he denied it by saying he forgotten it. He had not forgotten what he said. It was not the right time to say it and had not expected to say it.

He knew he hurt her when he ran away from the beach. "You have no idea how much you meant to me. What you mean to me." The words were true. She had always meant the world to him as his best friend, as someone he could trust. He loved her then and never wanted harm to come to her. He had told her once that he would always save her no matter what. At that moment he had to save her from the possibility of whatever happened that night with the suspects. True, he wanted to deal with Red John alone but he never wanted anybody close to him to get hurt during his hunt for revenge.

_I'm doing the same things I saw my father do _

_cause I was just a kid in a corner watching words as they turned black and blue_

"_You're so twisted up in your dishonesty that you have no idea how to act like a decent human being. No idea."_ Teresa's words came back to him. It was true he had forgotten how to be a decent human being. Dishonesty was an ingrained trait he had learned when he was young. His father taught him to be a con artist and taking advantage of his perceptive skill to make money conning people. Growing up in the carny life made him learn how to be a "psychic" later being dishonest with his later clients. Dishonesty was a way of his life for a long time. Angela had wanted him to get out of it but it was only thing he knew how to do.

_I'm the son of a son of a headstrong man_

_so defensive so full of foolish pride_

Pride had a way of getting him into trouble. It was the reason his family was killed. He had arrogantly talked about Red John on TV and came home to see a note discovering the slain bodies of his wife and daughter. That night and his guilt would haunt him for the duration of his hunt right until he killed the man.

It also caused him to take advantage of Teresa with the hunt and taking for granted that she would always be there and save him. Now that he could possibly lose her, he realized the importance of the impact she had in his life. She had always been there for him through the darkest times during his quest.

_But I just will not lose you baby _

_And I'm starting to realize_

Listening to Ted Randolph caused a realization in him. _"I was so filled with self hatred that I destroyed the best thing that ever happened to me. By the time I realized my mistake I was too late. She was gone."_ This was him. He needed to go. He had to try and fight. He needed to tell her how he felt. Otherwise, she would never know. She deserved to know no matter the outcome of her decision. He did not want to be like Ted and be too late. He could not lose the best thing in his life. He instantly stood up and headed towards the door. "I have to go to the airport."

_Ooh, ooh I think I know why I do this everytime_

_Ooh, ooh run the other way from a heart like mine_

The fear of getting close to anybody was why he could not tell how he felt to Teresa. Red John had not truly left him. During his search for Red John he was fearful if he got too close to someone they would be taken away with a horrible death. Finding Teresa with the Red John mark was one of the most terrifying things in his life. He thought she was gone.

When he took the cannolis that night he spoke the truth. He wanted her to be happy even it meant without him. That scene may have been different if Pike had not answered the door. This ended up being another time he ran away from her, from his feelings.

_I know the love that we got is good _

_Can I be a better man yeah I know I could _

Their unprofessed love was the best he had since his wife. They cared for each other.

He could be a better man to her. If he has the chance he will be the man he needs to be for her. He will compliment her, he will do romantic gestures, he will give the things a woman wants. He will try to be that perfect man. He will be completely honest with her.

_standing here in the middle of this moonlit road_

_I know just what I have to do _

Thank goodness for Abbott. Oh, how he is thankful his boss allows him to drive his Federal vehicle. Now driving he tries calling her. He leaves a message. He guesses she turned her phone off so she would not have to talk to him. She was so angry. He parks and now he has to find the terminal. He checks the schedule. This is it. He needs to find her. Hopefully he is not too late, if he has a chance.

_Ooh, ooh I'm runnin' to ya fast as I can tonight_

_Ooh,ooh gotta show you what it's like gotta show what it's like_

Now he is running across the tarmac since that is the only option now. He sees the plane. He has to get to her. This is his last chance. He sees the fence. He jumps over it and hurts his foot. Right now his foot does not matter. All he wants to do is get on the plane. He rushes up the stairs and soon knocks on the door. He is hoping the stewardess will let him in. She opens the door. He goes down the aisle and sees Teresa.

She's surprised to see him. He soon spills his heart and tears out and says the truth. The complete truth. "I love you, Teresa. It makes me very happy to be able to say that to you." It does make him happy even as he is being led out by security.

_To be loved, so loved by a heart like mine_

She is here. They talk about being in pickles and she asks if he meant what he said. He had meant it. It was the honest truth, but he knows she needs confirmation since the last time he denied it. Then when she reveals she feels the same way. It is the greatest feeling in the world. As soon as she says "_Say it again"_ he knows what he wants to do. He had said what he felt, but now all he wants to do is have her feel it by leaning across the table and kiss her. The moment that was years in the making. It does not matter to him if the guard is disapproving the physical contact. All that matters to him is her at this moment.

_Gonna wrap my arms around you as strong as young desire_

_cause for you it's only beating in a heart like mine_

As soon he finishes he sees her smile. It is a good feeling since the night before he had made her frown. Soon he sees Abbott and he announces that the TSA is realeasing him. As soon he gets up he just wraps his arms around Teresa and again shows the love he has is now all hers in a heart like his.

**Reviews are appreciated. You should listen to this song. The music is so good as well as the words above in italics. It sounds like the driven desperation of Jane trying to get to the airport during the episode. I picture him during the entire time.**


End file.
